This is a kind of angrily common occurrence for men. It is where you are there minding your own business and interacting in your normal life completely oblivious to the affections of a certain lady and then all of a sudden. Wham. Your mate declares that he is into her and you are like “Hold your horses there, I actually think I am quite fond of the old mare.” (internally)
It leaves me wondering, is it actually the fact that there is competition that actually spurs you on to. Like the last biscuit you weren’t arsed having but as soon as someone else goes in for the kill you are all “shit I really wanted that”. It is bizzare.
So there is this girl and to be honest I thought she had a bit of a thing for me the way she would piss herself at anything I said and also was kind of playfully accusing be of being a ‘total prick’ at every opportunity. That is a dead give away, it is the grown up version of pulling pigtails. Anyway, this other dude I know who had been with her friend until recently told me out of the blue that he was mad about her. It was far fetched, in hindsight, to think that he could get anywhere with her but he bulldozed into her, like a man overcome with emotions (would you believe) and confessed his interest with her. Telling the truth I was blindsided by his revelation so I was betting that she was too. And I was right.
Eventually she told him where to go, which was all she could do considering the situation (with her mate). My point now being that him confession of affection actually sparked a certain unknown interest that I had for her and now I seem to fancy her myself. I don’t know what it is but she kind of does something for me. She has a certain attractive demeanour, that is difficult to quantify. It was also sparked by I conversation I had with her about a fortnight ago where we told one another our complete life stories and we had an absolute blast. It is best described as ‘having a moment’. I think that set some kind of seed in me that has been kind of germinating for the last week. The fruit of which is the fucked up feelings I have towards her now.
The worst thing about it is the mixed messages I have been getting off her during the last few days. She seemed to brush off the great craic we had and now seems content to be just like ‘hi’ or even dismissive. I think this is actually amplifying my interest now. Terrible state to be in really.